The Mystery Of The Phenomena Of Autumn: "Aaaaah, Tum."

Okay, so we all know that Autumn also known as Fall or Harvest, is THE MOST BEAUTIFUL SEASON EVER TO EXIST AND DON'T ARGUE WITH ME BECAUSE IT IS MY FAVORITE AND THIS IS MY BLOG. *Cough* Anyways, I wanted to look up my favorite season and see what it's all about. So many people say Fall, but I like to say Autumn because it sounds softer and a lot more magical. Then I started to wonder, "Gee, I wonder where the word Autumn came from? It's such an odd word and it has one of those stupid 'silent' letters in it that the French seem to love so much (I'm not being mean, I have French origins so it's alright, and yes, we did surrender often, but it worked out in the end didn't it?!) So I looked it up, I googled it, and don't worry, I found a credible source, it's from Harvard, and it turns out the origin for the word 'Autumn' is a bit of a mystery. Here is the passage I found about it: 

"The word "Autumn" is a little more mysterious. It comes ultimately from Latin "autumnus", which itself is of uncertain origin. In Middle English, spoken about five hundred (500) years ago, it was spelled "autompne" having been borrowed from Old French "autompne" (found in modern French as "automne". Middle English "autompne" was sometimes used as early as the 1300s, but only became common during the 1500s. "

It looks like they forgot the butt end of their parenthesis. So much for Harvard, but anyways, I have decided to share my theory of the word. It's no surprise to me it's from Latin, everything is, and of course, I was right about the French to begin with. What no one knows is that the actual origin is this:

And God said, let there Tums, and there were Tums, and it was good. A while later a man, a man with very bad heartburn mind you, decided to take a break from his work of naming the earth, a break from his wife, and a break from his wife's cooking which had caused his uncomfortable predicament. The man discovered the Tum outside of his cave and was curious, so he ate it and decided it was good, and his reaction? "Aaaaah, Tum." (and that's how the Tum was named) While the man was doing all of this he had tuned out the voice of his wife (no surprise, even the first couple had it's problems). He didn't care, she was probably talking about work anyways, and she was. She had asked him what they should name the time of year they were in, the one with the colorful leaves and the chilly winds, and it was at this time the man had proclaimed his healing and reveled in the light of his new discovery. And also, I have to add, they were where France is now, but on the continent of Pangea. So they spelled it with that stupid silent 'n'. And the rest is history.

Excuse my poor excuse of an explanation. It was amusing to write, though I could do better I think, maybe another time, I'm too lazy.

OHOLY KARP It Is National Novel Writing Month

It is, I swear. (it is also "No Shave November" so remember to grow out your beards, mustaches, armpit hairs and leg hairs. I'm not going to mention anything else.) I would do it except I lack the ideas and the discipline, but if writing novels in a month is your kind of this I suggest you go check this out ---> http://www.nanowrimo.org/

I did actually sign up for it, but I never got the verification e-mail, I must have typed my email in wrong....twice.... oh well, I have too much work to do anyways!

Write a novel, the world will either appreciate it right now as it is, or it will become the bane of every kids existence when a couple hundred years from now you have died and teachers force their students to read that crazy novel and evaluate it when there really is no meaning at all O.O JUST LIKE WHOEVER WROTE "Le Morte De Arthur"!!!! OMG THAt BOOOOOOOOK... but if you like it, no offense. Hehe.

"Remember, never run with scissors, or any other pointy object! It's all fun and games until someone loses an EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEYEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"

I'm Not Who You Think I Am

I'm not who I think I am, you aren't who I think I am, I'm not who you think you are, I'm not who I think you are, you're not who you think I am, you aren't who I think I'm not, and I'm not who you think I should be so none of this matters and I've succeeded in confusing myself, as I am sure I confused you, which was my ultimate goal to end with.

Have you ever had a dream that felt so real you woke up crying? And sometimes you wake up, look back, and wonder why the hack you were crying because it wasn't all that sad? Well, I woke myself up in the middle of the night laughing, my dream was hilarious, but only while I was asleep. Something about someone carrying something and dropping it where it wasn't supposed to be dropped and it was funny as hell to my tired brain. But then again, we all laugh at people's mistakes, so maybe my dream wasn't as far from funny as I thought it was.

I love taking naps, but I hate doing it in public places because I know when I decide to wake up my face will be red and my arms will be asleep and I will look ridiculous with the pattern of my sleeve imprinted on my face like a very odd tattoo.

Writing gets rid of my writers block. That's the best thing about blogging (a conclusion I have come to after only one full day since creating this account) because I feel like anything is possible and if I write something no one likes then who cares? At least I'm having fun trying.

Inevitable

You can run
You can try to hide
But there is no escape from me
Everyone knows me, many people fear me
Some people fight me, and some try to run from me
Some people seek me out, and some people accept me
Some welcome me with open arms, yet others push me away
I can influence people in ways that no one else can
Sometimes people hate to see me
Others show relief when I come
Nothing can stop me
I cannot be bound
I am thief and giver
I am a comfort and a threat
I am Kind and cruel together
I can be found everywhere
For me, time is irrelevant
Sometimes I wait, sometimes I don't
Sometimes I'm patient, and others I'm not
I'm hiding behind every corner, in every room
You may not see me, but you know that I am there
For some I am a nightmare, for others a dream
I am the start of the beginning that comes at the end

I am a savior
I am an escape
I am a deliverer
I am a new path
I am confusion
I am chaos
I am silence
I am sorrow


I am death

DO YOU KNOW WHY BUFFALO FORD THE RIVER?

Neither do I, I thought it was oxen that forded rivers. "It's where the oxen used to ford the river and they started calling it 'Oxen Ford' and people done shortened it to 'Oxford'" (J D Clampett) Come on, I can be the only one who watches old tv shows. I love reminiscing with old friends.
If you didn't know, I'm a military brat and I've moved around 16 times throughout my life, and I'm recovering from the last one so hearing from my friends fills my heart with so much warm fuzziness I just want to find a giant panda bear and give it a giant hug, and then I want to cry because I can't see them.

Just so you now, I'm a crier, I'm a baby, a sucker, for movies and books and real life too. I cry watching "The Lion King" for goodness sakes. I cried when Dumbledore died (I like how my iPad recognizes Dumbledores name and doesn't make it a typo, yet it still thinks my name is spelled wrong.) Heck, I cry for no reason at all sometimes.

I get in sulky moods that I can never snap out of, I'm sure people think I'm being distant or rude (and it's probably true) but I have so much on my mind sometimes and I just can't shake it. I have yet to learn that secret. Then again, it was raining cats and dogs at the time so not seeing the sun (although I love the rain) can be a little bit of a downer.

I don't know how to end these things. I guess I could just....

I Have Decided...

...that I will write as often as I can here. And to those 11 unfortunate people who have viewed my page I hope my one day of bloging didn't overwhelm you. I tend to write a lot when I am in the mood, and this is so new and exciting I am sure there is a lot to come. Being the wishy washy and flaky person I am, however, I don't know how long this obsession will last. I have some topics in mind I would like to write about, but some of them seem a little too serious for my mood at the moment so I think I will hold off for now. Then again my mood changes like water in a river, so it might be later tonight if I have the time.........

I lost my train of thought (that's what I get for leaving in the middle to eat pork) I wish I could remember what I was going to say, but oh well. I guess I'll just have to say this: I remembered what I was going to say.

So, I have better WiFi here and I looked again for the song whose title is so similar to the name of this blog and I can say I am just too happy to listen to a song that...hmm...slow? Dark? I don't know what the lyrics are but the way the song sounded brought back some memories I would never want to relive. On the contrary, it's not a bad song, if I'm in the right mood it would be nice to listen to, it's one written by Michael Curd, here's the link: http://soundcloud.com/michael-curd/always-and-for-never

So now that one mystery is solved, I can sit easy! Oh wait, I have a test tomorrow... Sitting easy will have to wait I guess. 

I would like to say that I am a professional procrastinator. It works well because I don't work well over pressure.

Okay, so I like watching M*A*S*H, it's one of My favorite old television shows, but I find it hilarious watching the commercials in between because they are geared towards elderly people so I get to learn who can help me pay for my funeral, where to get a sit-down shower, and how to drive a scooter. I'm not even twenty yet, haha. I have a long time before I have to do that, why do they assume that only older people watch M*A*S*H?...never mind, don't answer that.

If I Were A Turtle I Would Rather Be A Bird: Avian Encounters

Oh it must be great to be a turtle, taking life slow and relaxing in a pond, they don't have many hopes, they take life as it comes. However, I am not a turtle, I have many hopes and more often than not my hopes are dashed, I get my hopes up and then they crumble, but such is my luck, it has always been that way. I wouldn't be able to take being a turtle for long, I'm an impatient person and want to get where I'm going and do it quickly because the longer I'm driving on the road the higher the chance I'm going to die. Not to mention I'm not much of a swimmer, although I would be a bird if I could be even if I am not much of a flier. 
To keep on the subject of animals, since I don't want to dwell on my disappointment of dashed hopes, birds have been very attracted to me today. It's almost a little scary except for the fact that I love birds, I love their wings and I envy them sometimes. I went to my speech class today and I sit next to a window (which I would like to brag, has a beautiful view of the lake) and sitting on the window right next to my chair is a little finch. Very, very cute, but I didn't sit down until it flew away because I didn't want to scare it. It made me smile. I wasn't expecting to see that same bird while I was sitting in the library (which is a floor below my class now that I think about it). I was just minding my own business and that little bird flies to the window, eats some bugs, sees me, eats some more, than moves on. I'm not allowed to eat in the library so I leave and sit outside in the sun, I wasn't paying attention until the people near me got up and left which made me look up, and as I look up I notice something next to me so I turn....and there is one of those huge cranes (the ones that are endangered so if you touch them or feed them you can be fined and put in jail) and it was staring at me as I ate my sandwich. It's mate was a little further away (they mate for life, isn't that amazing?). Well, I had my electronic devise in front of me and I began to close it up and it shined a light on the ground and ceiling (like the ones you can make with a watch when the light bounces off of it), which freaked the bird out, it was watching that light like a hawk (pun intended? Is that even a pun?) and so I moved it around a bit. I never thought a bird would play with light but this one was transfixed, it was hilarious. And (I don't care if I shouldn't start a sentence with 'and' but I did it anyways!) of course there is a guy (whose name I do not know but I see him everywhere) and he was sitting nearby chuckling about it. After a while I'd decided to leave the birdie alone and it got bored (I was done eating) and left with it's mate. If any more birds follow me today I'm going to come to the conclusion that I am either a reincarnation of St. Francis or that I am growing wings (I'm wearing a shirt that has a wing design on the back, does that count?). I would love to grow wings, it's my wish, if it were at all possible I would give my soul to have some wings (actually I wouldn't, but I would LOVE to be able to fly). Too bad it's not possible. Oh well, maybe evolution will take over and do something right and give us wings. I just need to live long enough.

Even The Bugs Are Hitting Their Heads On It

(I would like to point out that I wrote this a while ago and it doesn't quite apply to me now, it did when I wrote it, but I thought maybe you would find some interest in this)

A Sort-Of (Not Really) Helpful (Yeah Right) Article-Thing for the Romantically Impaired (Such as Myself)


I've been sighing a lot lately, so much in fact that I don't notice I'm sighing until someone points it out. All of us go through these times, and sometimes they're difficult to get through. The worst are the wishful sighs, the ones you know are probably not going to happen in a million years, like it has the same chance of happening as pigs flying, or Hell freezing over, or something to that effect, and just my luck, the wishful sighs make up the majority of the one's I've had lately. Most of you have had the dilemma that I've found my self in now, and if you haven't, then you will, I can guarantee that. (Not that that's a good thing, it most definitely isn't.) 
I'm confident that most of you know what I'm talking about by now, I mean, what other reasons are there to sigh as much as this? If you haven't guessed, maybe this will help clarify: 

Imagine, if you would for a moment, 
That you are walking somewhere,
Maybe down the street, in the school halls, or along the beach for example.
Can you see it?
If you can, then imagine that you suddenly notice someone familiar,
They're walking in your direction,
A little to the left of the path you are walking along.
As soon as you recognize who it is, 
Imagine that your heart stops for a second.
(And not in a bad way, though it does sound a little unhealthy.)
When they pass, with maybe a glance, or a smile in your direction,
You can't help but smile too, or feel like dying a little from happiness.

But then they pass you and keep walking,
Leaving you to look at them over your shoulder
As they disappear.

If I were actually talking to you, rather than writing, this would be the point where you would hear me sigh a very long, drawn out sigh, that horrible, dreadful, and absolutely DESPISEABLE sound.
Now that you see my problem, you may be asking yourself at this moment, why is that sigh is such a horrible thing? Let me put it in one word for you:

Unrequited

If you don't know what that means (and I think you should know)  it means not returned, or maybe one-sided in this context. Yes, it's a horrible word for circumstances such as these. You see, when you like someone, you sigh a lot, you think about them all the time, your grades may slowly start to drop, you always want to be hanging out with that person, though sometimes it feels strange to try to start up a conversation with them. Whenever you see them, you have a mini heart attack, whenever you hear their name, you jump, it's a really curious thing. (It almost sounds like a sickness, where the list above represents all the symptoms. Hey, maybe that's where the term 'love sick' comes from, what do you think? Smart, right?) You always wish you could read their mind, so that you wouldn't have to ask them what you really want to know the answers too. Your mood always revolves around that one person's actions or words towards you. If you see them and have a nice conversation, your day is amazingly bright, but if you don't see them, or they decide that they don't have much to say to you, the value of your day drops down so low that even the bugs are hitting their heads on it.
It's days like that which that bring on another type of sigh, if it can even be called that sometimes, because for the most part, this particular sigh turns into a very strange noise that most people don't make unless they're, I don't know, dying? I'm of course referring to the sigh of frustration, which sounds less like a sigh and more like this:

RAAAAAAAAWRG

Of course, with as many exclamation points as you feel it would need.

The reason for this sigh, which is about as bad as the wishful sigh, is the not knowing how the other person feels about you. How are you supposed to know? They're like a whole other species! Besides, you can't read their mind like you wish you could. And if you're shy like I am, then it's really difficult to ask. Also, a bit of advice, never ask your friends to talk to them, it's not very sincere, and if you absolutely have to write a note, make sure it's WRITTEN and not TYPED (Though I think that's pretty self explanatory.).
Of course, if you do talk to them, and for some reason they don't give you an answer either way, it's really frustrating to wait, especially since you don't want to seem desperate or stalker-like by approaching them again. You can never decide if you should try to hang out with them more, or if you should back off because you're being creepy, it's always really complicated (actually, it's more overly complicated, but that complicates things a little too much, so I'll leave it at that). Of course, it's times like this where a person can over-analyze everything, over-think everything that this one person does or says, and do something that turns out to be a regretful mistake (or it could be just plain embarrassing), or you could just not think rationally at all, and then regret the words you finally gathered the courage to say to them.
Of course, I'm not talking about just myself here, this could happen to anyone. I mean, none of this has happened to me right? (Just nod your head, and I'll be happy.) Besides, I'm speaking for everyone who's ever had this problem. Just write about it, or something, I find that it really helps.
Ok, and just to say this, it's really difficult to talk to that person sometimes, isn't it? I mean, there are always those awkward silences that pop up in random places when you really wish they wouldn't, and of course you can't run from them (Just because they would think you're strange if you just randomly ran away). It's especially bad when you're in the car with that person, and for some reason the radio isn't on and there's nothing being said. Can you say that this is a little problematic? What do you talk about in times like that? The weather?
Or maybe you're the opposite, and you talk too much around them, about things that don't matter, and you end up asking yourself why you would even talk about something like that? Do they even care enough about you to even try to listen to this kind of nonsense? No one really knows.
I think it's safe (and perfectly true) to say that the opposite sex is the most confusing and puzzling phenomena that humankind has ever faced, and none of it will ever be explained anytime soon. And myself? Things never seem to work out for me, but I hope that if, like me, things never work out, you may have gotten some really useless ideas from this that might serve a purpose at a later date (no pun intended). With all that said, I wish you luck.

Blogs: A Way To Say Whatever, Rant To The World, And Then Realize That No One Can Hear You

I never really intended to ever have a blog. To be fair, I did create one a while ago (and by a while, I mean maybe a few years ago) but I can't remember if I wrote anything on it or not. Needless to say the username and password were flushed completely out of my head and I am left wondering what it was called and if I really did indeed write anything on it. Doesn't matter, the past is the past, but if you find my old blog I will make you a sandwich.
So, I looked at what I wanted the title to be, and for no reason at all my mind screams at me "FOR ALWAYS AND FOR NEVER!" and I thought, "Wow, that's catchy. Sounds like it could be the name of a song." and I totally disregarded the thought to check and see if I was right. However after this account was activated I decided to google it, and I found that there is a song called 'Always and for Never" but I couldn't load the page (the WiFi here is a little iffy, haha) so I don't even know if I like the song or not. Anyways, ignore that it is very similar to that name and we should be fine!
Technically this is the first time I have blogged (since I can't remember if I have or not before) so I'm not exactly sure how this works, but I assume I write anything I want and people can comment if they desire (if they ever find the page). I guess I just want to rant to the world about anything and everything, and the great thing is no one will know who I am (or can people figure it out? I have no freaking clue) but it's nice to think I am anonymous just in case I say something offensive, which I try not to do.
I suppose you might want to know a little about me? I think of myself as a nice person, then again I'm like anyone else and I can be angry. I have a fat lazy cat, I answer phones as a job (for now) I am 18ish and trying to figure out what I want to do with my life. College is fun, I have a bee nest built into the backseat passenger door of my car, I am a wishy washy person and often a little odd, and I really like ketchup on my grilled cheese sandwiches. I'm going to warn you now that I pretend to be funny.

I have a feeling this is going to be fun!